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One of my major issues with evangelical Christianity is that they treat salvation like a golden ticket. If you’ve prayed the sinner’s prayer at least once in your life, then you are in. You’re going to heaven.

“Dear Jesus, please come into my heart.”

BOOM! Saved – forever and ever.

I was taught that you can’t lose your salvation. I was taught that even if you never once acted like a Christian, you would still go to heaven. For we are saved by grace, not by works.

I love how the Orthodox Church teaches that if you have faith, then you will have works. How can you believe and not act like a Christian? A true believer wants to become more like God. Her whole life is a journey towards deification (theosis).

If I had listened to the Baptist preachers growing up, I probably wouldn’t be working out my salvation with fear and trembling right now. I’ve known for years that what they taught was hypocritical and silly. The golden ticket theology didn’t make sense. Theosis, however, makes complete sense, and it feels purposeful.

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Feminism and Sex Crimes

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I saw this picture* last night, along with the caption, “This picture shows how ridiculous feminism is.”  Of course, this is a totally photoshopped picture.

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The snarky pic above is a commentary on Slut Walk. 

 

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During Slut Walks, women and men protest rape culture by holding signs like this.

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Some people hold signs like this.

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This week, one of my friends told me I should take a self defense class, so I could prevent sexual battery.  This is because, lately, I’ve been inappropriately touched a few times without my consent.  A self defense class is not going to stop sexual battery or rape from happening.  The inappropriate, nonconsensual actions will still happen to me.  A self defense class could possibly change the outcome of the situation.  The few times I was inappropriately and non-consensually touched, the men stopped after I told them very firmly to stop.  If they had not stopped, self defense would have come in handy at that moment.  However, self defense classes in and of themselves would not stop the initial incident. 

The only thing that prevents a sex crime is for the perpetrator to freaking not do it.

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Back to the original picture.  The “Kid Walk” picture.

Apparently the artist takes offense at the idea that sexual abusers are the ones responsible for their own behavior.  When a child runs into the street without looking and is hit by a car, is it the driver’s fault?  (Sometimes.  It depends on the situation.  Let’s say it’s not the driver’s fault.)  When a woman is at a frat party and gets raped, is it her fault?  No.  It’s not her fault. 

When a car hits a child, it is an accident.  Rape and sexual abuse are not accidents.  The abuser does what he/she wants, ignoring the victim’s wishes.  He might not even ask permission.  He might just do it. 

If a person commits a crime against another person, who is at fault?  The victim, or the perpetrator?  If Andy steals a watch from Sally, Andy is at fault, because he committed the crime.  In almost every type of crime, the perpetrator is always assumed to be responsible for committing the crime.  Why isn’t it like that for sex crimes? 

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I shouldn’t have to take a self defense course so that I can stop someone from raping me after I told him no.

I shouldn’t have to be subjected to lewd comments because I look pretty.

I shouldn’t have to switch places on the train because someone decides they need to feel me up.

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What can I do to prevent a sex crime against me?  Nothing.  My clothes won’t stop it from happening.  Being ugly won’t stop it from happening.  Punching the perpetrator won’t stop the initial crime from happening.  If someone wants to commit a sex crime, they’re going to commit a sex crime.

What can you do to prevent committing a sex crime?  Don’t do it.

 

 

*Childism is a real thing.  Childism is the belief that your children are your property, and you can do with them what you wish.  You can hit them.  You can deny them food.  You can imprison them.  Childism is a system where children have no or very few rights.  I suspect that the person posting the above picture would scorn childism as foolish, probably more than he scorns feminism.

Two Years Ago

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Two years ago I got married.

I didn’t know it wasn’t right. I thought it would be wonderful.  I thought we would be together forever. 

Sometimes bad things happen.  Sometimes things just don’t work out the way you wanted them to.  All you can do is push on and power through, sometimes gracefully, sometimes not so much. 

My friends and family that have supported me for the last six months – thank you. I love you all so very much. 

So now onto the new.  I think 2014 is going to be an amazing year. 

You know, no matter what, I am eternally optimistic.  Maybe it’s just part of my charm.